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SKETCHES. 289
compagnie,” unless we make an alliance against it with
some friend who is more trustworthy and powerful than it.
Personally Tam not much acquainted with ennui; but
I have known it a little in former days, when in order to fly
from it I retreated to my window, and there found a cure
for it. I remember particularly one day, or rather one
evening! I was at that time young, and carried in my
bosom a heart palpitating with a longing for life’s richness,
for that fullness of existence which I had heard of and read
of, and which I had deeply felt that I could enjoy, impart-
ing and receiving, but which I had not then ever tasted.
For my home was rich enough in silks and finery and
French engravings and parties and equipages; but my life
was nevertheless poor, and my soul hungered. This hap-
pens to many.
I resided in the capital. All those who belonged to
me, my father, mother, and sisters, were at the New
Year’s ball, given by the Burgesses to the Royal Family,
but I had to stay at home, in order to nurse the remain-
der of a slight cold, and to keep my old paternal grand-
mother company. (N. B.,—1I had entertained some little
suspicion that the remainder of my cold was magnified
somewhat by my good parents, for the sake of the old
grandmother, and that she might have company, which
suspicion did not much improve my temper.) But—I
secretly wiped away a tear; was glad that my eldest sis-
ter looked -so handsome in her new ball-dress, and that
she might possibly have a dance with the Crown-Prince ;
was delighted with my brother’s new uniform, in which
he looked so stately, and determined to amuse myself
as well as possible in my solitude with reading, music,
and — myself. Old grandmother was not a very cheering
companion. She was a little deaf, and spent her evenings
by telling fortunes in cards to herself, until the hour for
going to bed at ten o’clock when, after having looked at
her watch, she invariably took her bedroom candle, say-
19
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