- Project Runeberg -  The Confession of a Fool /
310

(1912) [MARC] Author: August Strindberg Translator: Ellie Schleussner
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and, thanks to my efforts, my wife was engaged for a
number of performances.

I had made a rod for my own back. For a whole
month I was widower, bachelor, head of the family,
housekeeper. In compensation my wife, on her return,
brought home with her two large packing-cases full of
wreaths and bouquets.

But she was so happy, so young and so charming, that
I took at once the necessary steps to secure a fresh
engagement for her. I knew that by doing this I was
running the risk of having to leave my country, my
friends, my position, my publisher—and for what? For
a woman’s whim.... But let that pass! Either a man
is in love or he isn’t....

Fortunately for me, my correspondent had no room in
his company for an actress without a repertoire.

Was that my fault? At the thought of it I literally
rolled over in my bed with pleasure. What a good thing
an occasional little self-examination is! It unburdens the
heart... it rejuvenated me.

But to proceed. Children were born to us at short
intervals. One—two—three. But again and again her
yearning for the stage returned. One ought to persevere!
A new theatre was being opened. Why not offer the
manager a new play with a good part for the leading
actress, a sensational play, dealing with the “woman
question” which loomed so large at the time?

No sooner thought than done. For, as I have already
said, either a man is in love, or he isn’t.

The play was produced. It contained a splendid part
for the leading actress, magnificent dresses (of course), a
cradle, much moonshine, a villain; an abject husband in
love with his wife (myself), a wife about to become a
mother (a stage novelty), the interior of a convent—and
so on.

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