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VII
MY SISTER
BUT incomparably greater than all the other
influences which were reflected in my childhood was
the influence upon me of my sister Aniuta.
The feeling which I cherished for her from my very
infancy was extremely complicated. I admired her
beyond measure, I obeyed her implicitly in
everything, and felt very much flattered every time that she
permitted me to take part in anything in which she
was concerned. I would have gone through fire and
water for my sister, and at the same time, in spite of
my warm attachment to her, there nested in the
depths of my soul a grain of that particular sort of
envy which we so often, almost unconsciously, feel
toward people who are very near to us, whom we
admire greatly, and whom we would like to imitate in
all things.
Nevertheless it was a sin to envy my sister, for her
lot was far from being a happy one, to tell the truth.
My parents had removed to the country for
permanent residence precisely at the time when she began
to emerge from childhood.
Not long after our removal, the Polish insurrection
broke out, and as our estate lay on the very borders
of Lithuania and Russia, the echoes of that
uprising concerned us. The majority of the neighboring
landed proprietors, and especially the wealthiest and
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