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133
SÖNYA KOVALÉVSKY
has read Dostoevsky’s letter to you, and almost died
on the spot with shame and despair," said poor mama,
with difficulty restraining her tears.
Aniuta turned frightfully pale, but mama went on:
" Please to control yourself for the present, at least.
Remember that we have guests who would all be glad
of a chance to gossip about us. Go and dance as if
nothing had happened."
Thus my mother and sister continued to dance
until nearly morning, both beside themselves with fear
at the thought of the thunderstorm which was ready
to break over their heads as soon as the guests were
gone.
And, in fact, a terrible thunderstorm did break.
Until every one was gone, papa admitted no one to
a sight of him, and sat locked up in his study. In
the pauses between the dances, my mother and sister
hastened from the room and listened at his door, but
dared not enter, and returned to their guests
tormented by the thought, "How is he now? Is he
ill?"
When all was quiet in the house he summoned
Aniuta to him, and what did he not say to her! One
phrase of his in particular engraved itself upon her
mind: " Anything may be expected from a girl who
is capable of entering into correspondence with a
strange man, unknown to her father and mother,
and receiving money from him. You sell your
novels now, but the time will probably come when you
will sell yourself."
Poor Aniuta fairly turned to ice when she heard
these dreadful words. Assuming that she recognized
in her soul that this was nonsense, yet father spoke
so confidently, in a tone of such conviction,—his face
was so downcast, afflicted, and his authority, in her
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