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174 The Century of the Child
that which is already exhausted. The other
class strive to model their childen not
according to themselves but according to their
ideal of goodness. They show their love by
their willingness to extinguish their own per-
sonalities for their children’s sake. This thej’’
do by letting the children feel that everything
which concerns them stands in the foreground.
This should be so, but only indirectly.
The concerns of the whole scheme of life,
the ordering of the home, its habits, intercourse,
purposes, care for the needs of children, and
their sound development, must stand in the
foreground. But at present, in most cases,
children of tender years, as well as those who
are older, are sacrificed to the chaotic con-
dition of the home. They learn self-will with-
out possessing real freedom; they live mider a
discipline which is spasmodic in its application.
When one daughter after another leaves
home in order to make herself independent they
are often driven to do it by want of freedom,
or by the lack of character in family life. In
both directions the girl sees herself forced to
become something different, to hold different
opinions, to think different thoughts, to act
contrary to the dictates of her own being. A
mother happy in the friendship of her own
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