- Project Runeberg -  The Confession of a Fool /
205

(1912) [MARC] Author: August Strindberg Translator: Ellie Schleussner
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THE CONFESSION OF A FOOL 205
her of my presence I made a sudden gesture, like a
dreamer rousing himself from a dream. She pulled her-
self together with an effort, and, her eyes resting on
the huge tops of his boots, she clumsily extricated herself
from an awkward position by remarking

" I wonder whether boots of this sort are expensive ?

*



What was I to think of such a stupid remark ?
To divert her mind from the voluptuous current of her
thoughts, I made the lad change places with me under
some pretext or other.
I tried to forget this irritating scene ; tried to persuade
myself that I had been mistaken, although similar scenes
were stored up in my memory, recollections of her burning
eyes scrutinising the lines of my body underneath my
clothes.
A week later my suspicions were re-awakened by an
incident which once and for all destroyed all my hopes
of ever seeing this perverse woman realise my ideal of
motherhood.
One of my friends spent a week-end with us. He made
himself very agreeable to her. She rewarded his courtesy
by flirting with him outrageously. It grew late ; we said
good-night to each other and separated. I thought that
she had gone to bed.
Half-an-hour later I heard voices on the balcony. I
stepped out quickly, and found wife and friend sitting
together, drinking liqueurs. I treated the matter as a
joke, but on the following morning I reproached her with
making me a public laughing-stock.
She laughed, called me a man of prejudices, cursed
with a fantastic and vicious imagination ... in fact,
deluged me with her whole repertory of futile arguments.
I lost my temper ; she had hysterics and played her part
so well that I apologised for doing her an injustice.

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