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152 REGNARD’S JOURNEY TO LAPLAND.
tempett, which in one moment drives their veflels againft the clouds, and in the next
precipitates them to hell : {uch are the defcriptions of fome. For my part, without any
exaggeration, I fhall mention that the Baltic Sea is famous for the number of fhipwrecks
which happen in it; and that it can feldom be croffed in the autumn without being
expofed to bad weather, for in winter it is not navigable. We were obliged in our
paflage to take in fail five or fix times; and although it is generally made in three or
four days, our paflage was {till longer.
Thefe misfortunes were of fome ufe; and the time during which we remained at
anchor was not the portion of my life which has been the moft ufelefsly fpent. I went
every day to the perpendicular rocks, on which I remained fome hours, where the
abruptnefs of the precipices and the view of the fea accorded extremely well with my
reveries. It was during thefe folitary meditations that I entered wholly into myfelf,
and inveftigated the inmoft fentiments of my heart, to place truth in full view, without
difguife, fuch as it really exifted. I caft a look back upon the events of my patt life,
reflected upon my defigns which had never been executed, my refolutions broken, and
my unfuccefsful enterprifes, I confidered my prefent mode of life, my wandering voy-
ages, my changes of abode, the diverfity of objects, and the conftant motion to which
I was expofed: I felt myfelf wholly in that ftate where inconftancy is the prevalent
inclination ; and I came to this conclufion, without being in the fmalleft degree mifled by
the fuggeftions of felf-love : 1 judged impartially of every thing: I reflected that all this
conduct was in direct oppofition to the real enjoyment of life, which confifts folely in
repofe; and that this defirable tranquillity of foul is to be experienced in the purfuit of
an agreeable profeflion, which retains us in a fteady pofition, like a fhip held by an
anchor in the midft of a tempeft. All the vague defigns, inveftigations of the future,
chimeras, expeciations of fortune, are only fantoms “that miflead us, which we take
pleafure in forming, and with which our minds entertain themfelves. _All the obftacles
which ambition excites, far from flopping us, ought to make us diftruftful of ourfelves,
and more than ever apprehenfive.
You know, Sir, as well as I do, that bh choice of a profeflion is one of the moft diffi-
cult attempts of a man’s conduct; and on this account there are numbers who never
embrace any, remaining in continual indolence, living not as they would have withed,
but as they have begun, whether it arife from the fear of vexatious occurrences, the
love of idlenefs, the hatred of toil, or any other caufes.
There are other men who are not retarded in their career by obftacles, and who
giving themfelves up to that inconftancy which is natural to them, cannot enjoy repofe
even when unemployed : they are continually agitated with new ideas and defigns: they
change folely froma defire of change and a natural inconftancy ; and that which they
have left pleafes them always more than that which they enjoy. The whole life of thefe -
men is a continual agitation; and if they are fometimes obferved to be at reft in their
old age, it is not the hatred of change which influences them, but the laflitude of age,
rendering them lefs capable of motion, and preventing them from undertaking any enter-
prife; like thofe reftlefs individuals who are unable to fleep, but who from frequently.
tofling find at length that repofe which wearinefs procures them.
I know not which of thefe fituations are the moft unhappy, but I am convinced that
they are both extremely difagreeable: hence arife thofe tempefts of the foul, and boif-
terous paflions, which make one wifh that one neither could nor dared to undertake
any thing, when one fears every thing, hopes every thing, and is defirous to feek fome
where elfe that happinefs to which one is a f{tranger : hence alfo arife thofe difcontents,
that difpleafure with ourfelves, that impatience at our idlenefs, thofe complaints which
we
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