Full resolution (JPEG) - On this page / på denna sida - VI. Hell
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projections isolated by wooden panels, and on
each there lies a photograph album or some other
book, in order to give these diabolical machines,
which I am inclined to think are accumulators,
an innocuous appearance. Moreover, on a roof
in the Rue Censier, exactly opposite my summerhouse,
I see two workmen. I cannot make out
what they are doing, but they seem to have an
eye on my glass-door and are busy with objects
which I cannot distinguish.
Why do I not escape? Because I am too
proud, and must bear the inevitable. I
therefore prepare myself for the night. I take a
bath, and am especially careful to wash my feet,
for my mother has told me when a child, that
there is something disgraceful in dirty feet. I
shave and perfume myself, and put on the underclothes
which I bought three years ago in Vienna
for my wedding—the toilet of a man condemned
to die. I read the psalms in the Bible in which
David invokes the wrath of the Eternal upon
his enemies. I do not read the penitential
psalms. I have no right to remorse, for it is
not I who have guided my destiny. I have never
requited evil with evil, except when I had to
defend myself. To be remorseful is to criticise
Providence, which imposes sin on us as a
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