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RECOLLECTIONS OF CHILDHOOD 141
Of course, from that day forth I became
passionately fond of music. I begged my mother to get me
a good teacher, and during the whole of our stay in
Petersburg, I spent every leisure moment at the
piano, so that in the course of three months I really
did make a great deal of progress.
Now I prepared a surprise for Dostoévsky. One
day he happened to say that of all musical
compositions he loved most of all Beethoven’s " Sonata
Pathé-tique," and that this sonata always overwhelmed him
with a whole world of forgotten sensations. Although
the sonata was considerably more difficult than any
of the pieces which I had hitherto played, I
determined to learn it at any cost; and really, by
expending a vast amount of labor on it, I got to the point
where I could play it fairly well. All that I now
waited for was a convenient opportunity when I
might rejoice Dostoévsky. This opportunity soon
presented itself.
Only five or six days remained before our
departure. Mama and my aunts were invited to a grand
dinner at the Swedish Embassy, the ambassador
being an old friend of our family. Aniuta, who had
already tired of balls and dinners, excused herself on
the plea of a headache. We remained alone in the
house. That evening Dostoévsky came to us.
Our approaching departure, the consciousness that
none of the elders was at home, and that such an
evening would not soon come again, put us in an
agreeably excited frame of mind. Feödor
Mikhåilo-vitch, also, was in rather a strange, nervous mood —
not irritable, as had often been the case with him of
låte, but, on the contrary, gentle, amiable.
This was a capital moment to play his favorite
sonata to him. I had rejoiced in advance at the thought
of the pleasure which it would cause him.
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