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96 THE CONFESSION OF A FOOL
Irritated and disgusted by her brazen flirtations, which I
considered bad form, I responded by a callous indifference.
It hurt me that the woman whom I adored should behave
like a vulgar coquette.
She always seemed to be enjoying herself immensely,
and prolonged the parties till the small hours of the morn-
ing ; I became more and more convinced that she was
discontented and bored with her home life ; that her long-
ing for an artistic career was dictated by a petty vanity,
a desire to be seen and enjoy herself. Vivacious, full of
exuberant spirits, of a restless disposition, she possessed
the art to shine ; she was always the centre of a crowd,
more in consequence of a certain gift to attract people
than because of her natural charms. Her great vitality,
her nervous excitability, compelled the most refractory to
listen to her, to pay homage to her. And I also noticed
that as soon as her nervous force was exhausted, the spell
was broken, and she was left sitting alone and unnoticed
in a quiet corner. Ambitious, yearning for power,
perhaps heartless, she took care that the men paid her
every attention ; the society of women had no attraction
for her.
Doubtless, she had made up her mind to see me at her
feet, doting, vanquished, sighing. One day, after an
evening of triumph, she told one of her friends that I was
head over ears in love with her. When I called at her
friend’s house a short time afterwards, I stupidly
remarked that I had hoped to meet the Baroness.
"Oh, indeed! " laughed the lady of the house, "you
haven’t come to see me then! How unkind of you!
"
"Well, I haven’t. To tell you the truth, I’m here
by appointment."
"A tryst, then!
"
" You may call it so, if you like ! Anyhow, you’ll give
me credit for having put in a prompt appearance!
"
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